What has humanity become ?

In light of the recent controversy in the newest upload by famous Youtuber, Logan Paul in his daily vlogs, I feel the need to bring up this issue and share my thoughts along with the rest of the YouTube community. I’m not jumping in on the bandwagon to chime in and gain viewership or anything. Just want to be able to reflect on the state of humanity and also give an unbiased view of how the general population felt about the issue as well as an idea of why this might have happened.

The background of what happened and what the deleted video entails can be found everywhere when you Google his name.

I don’t have to elaborate my consensus as with everyone else in the right mind. I would like to just provide a logical explanation as to why I understand why Logan Paul made this grave and unforgivable mistake.

In his growing self obsession to be the best entertainer, highest number of subscribers and views and most famous youtuber, he has definitely lost himself in this journey. The same picture has been painted by many youtubers who has raised their concerns as well. He is white, attractive, charismatic, young, rich, self entitled, self obsessed and privileged. These adjectives already describe the perfect recipe for disaster. He has lost his passion for the art of creating an art form on the widely viewed YouTube community to inspire others. He has no intention to inspire anymore. He became obsessed with his viewership and likes in his daily vlogs.

A simple analogy to help you slip into his shoes. As we become a more and more of a social network driven society, we become self obsessed. Intently editing and uploading the best image of yourself on IG to gain likes. Just as you were in the midst of that, the waitress comes in with your order and you were too obsessed to say thank you. This is a very small act of disrespect to the people around you. This act is only forgiven because of its magnitude and the growing number of people actively doing it, but it should still not have happened.

The case with Logan Paul was of a more serious nature. Using the thumbnail and title hooks, using a dead body as an appeal for people to click on it. He and his team has obviously no respect for that man. There’s just so many things that are wrong at so many levels. The thought that it would make great content going to the suicide forest which is such a sacred place in Japan, the whole crew of them going there expecting to find bodies and thinking it’s okay, the team of people editing the video and didn’t feel the need to stop him from releasing it, no one around him stops him from doing such outrages acts, just to name a few. What is wrong with not just him but his social circle?

Next, the amount of likes the video gained. I just cannot. Who in the right mind actually likes such content? To think that there are people out there that thinks finding a dead body of someone who went there to commit suicide was funny and quality content, that just out right crazy. Again, what has humanity become? Do we have no respect whatsoever anymore? I think this lesson should be reflected upon by everyone and learn that we can all treat each other with a little more genuine respect.




Waves of sorrow

I’m not one to understand or diagnose to have depression. But sometimes I think I truly relate to that feeling.

This boiling sense of sadness like larva that keeps spewing out uncontrollably. A butterfly effect; a slight memory either happy or sad triggering a tidal wave of emotions that adds on to the intensity of the larva churning deep down. The feeling of wanting to be alone, in a dark room, curled up in bed and letting life pass by your face. Finding solitude and peace in the fact that you don’t have to participate in activities or responsibilities. Just being dead, but not dead. Maybe, dead inside. The mental decision to remove your existence from the face of life. Not having to think, make decisions or worry. Essentially an excuse to feel nothing. And then these tears, it’s like your body doesn’t need water to function anymore. It just keeps removing it. Crying becomes involuntary. And this vicious cycle comes in where you don’t know why you’re crying but you’re still crying.

These are just snippets of my life where this feeling creeps through my veins. But not enough to diagnose it as a serious mental disorder or dysfunction. We need to also, understand that there are people around us feeling this constantly. I can’t imagine how that must feel.

Just some late night expressions. Goodnight world.




When you pull me close, my head resting on your chest as I feel your warmth and heart beating, along with your gentle breathing in sync with mine. A sign of how alive and strong we are. The intensity Unfathomable and Unwavering. Like the solar flares that hits the Earth’s magnetic fields shining light upon our souls. It’s beauty immense and strong. A sight never to be forgotten. As we talked about our years to come, sprouting flowers and green as we pave the road ahead. The feeling of warmth and light fill our hearts as the journey ahead lights up, where our telepathic strength ignited the passion of building a future we could only dream about before this moment. With a flush of emotions lapping ever so strongly against the previous wave, warm tears stream down over the smile across my face. The notion of hope and power triggered a heartfelt solace into a future that once seemed foggy and uncertain. As our fingers intertwined, our breaths exhaled softly and I could almost feel your smile mimicking mine, there’s no doubt we both knew it felt right.

Life and its facade

Life as we know it is never truly the same at every time point. Life as a child, adolescent, adult, elder. Perception shifts like a pendulum, always returning to its beginning. An entry point, an exit.

In the eyes of a child, the picture seemingly bright and hopeful. In the eyes of an uninspired adult, a bleak but hollow end to the tunnel. The facade of life.

In each perspective, life goes on in constant speed and volume. Just as a time point cannot be expanded or altered. But the frame we capture in our minds differs and that’s the beauty in humanity. Whatever we say or do does not have a direct impact on the nature of life as we know it, but the nature of your perception. The existence of life passes us like a river. The “what” is constant but the “why” ever changing. The outcome dependent on the action. The infinity of past and future gapes before us – A chasm whose depths we cannot see.


It was one but a dip in probability. A tug at a line so weak, that humanity is questioned when it should have been dealt with utter faith. Trust is lost, shattered and buried.

He walked on a line so thin, gazing through the open valley beneath, the wind ever so gently teasing that flame within. Shaken but committed, unfazed by all environmental distractions, he gave humanity a chance. To look beyond the present moment of emotions. But the light of hope from redemption, hitting his skin with immense warmth and love. The power of hope shall never be belittled. For one who doubt it shall cower away and blame it on luck and forever live in the uncertainty of the dark forest.

Is it luck or the doing of your actions? Luck is defined by men who are incapable of deciphering the abnormality in the pattern of probability yet eager to give it its name. The world is a better place where we are driven by rationality and actions that are reminded of consequences. A theory proven time and time again.

A picture depicts the silhouette a man standing in a tunnel with a split road, both a sign of life and hope. But what is the life the man wants? An action leads to another and another. The pain of a moment saved him the pain of a lifetime. A wrong turn ignited a fire within that made its mark on the walls. The art of a dancing flame. Barely painful but enough to leave its scar. A sign of hope in humanity.



Dream A Little Dream || Tears Into Laughter (12.02.17)

As I nap, longer than usual, entering a next phase of sleep cycle, a sleep so deep, my memory churns out images and my cognitive turns them into moving films. This is the story it created…

A marriage turned into graduation ceremony. Sounds of weeping from a wedded Wife and Mother. As I walked with my red coat, it slowly chimed in with fits of laughter and college cheers. I grew increasingly nervous about what’s to come. Questions hit me like bullets through my pounding heart. Who’s marriage? Why am I involved? What should I say? WHy are there college cheers? Where am I? Who are they?

As I walk in the grassy pavement lined with ancient stone arches leading up to a great white building where the event was held. My coat was too big. I couldn’t stop walking. My Grandmother appeared to my right and handed me a special red coat. I exchanged it quickly and sped off. As I entered the building, darkness consumed me and day turned to night. I stood there for a while and my eyes soon adjusted and led me to an empty chair. I see throngs of people sitting and awaiting their turn to enter the stage to receive their scroll. The seat beside me soon became empty and I was wondering where the ushers are. I was clueless, when is my turn? A guy without the red coat everyone else was wearing, trudged up beside me with an attitude. He laid down low on the chair and hung his legs up. His head was so close to me, I skeet away. Disgusted by his attitude, I took stance and observed my surrounding in hope of familiarity.

Shawn, was smiling and clutching his scroll and congratulated by his friends. He walked by me with that suave motion that made the butterflies swoon all over my tummy the way it did all those years back.  I didn’t say hi. I smiled in my heart and acknowledged that we are graduating together. School has brought our unscheduled destiny, together once again. Then, I saw Quenten at another section. Finally! I almost ran to him. I touched him but he was coolly reading a book with shades on. Not sure how he can still see anything in such dim lighting and shades on. I was surprised by the nonchalant attitude. Seeing an empty chair in front, I took a seat and sulked when I noticed justin beside me. More than happy to entertain me, we chatted for a while and he was reading a book too. I rest my head on his shoulders and the scent of familiarity washed over me. I opened my eyes and caught a glimpse of the book he was reading. It’s a sketch story of the latest movie I watched. I jumped in exclamation and we jumped into the topic right away. I reached behind for Quenten yet again but got shunned off. I’m not sure what I did but he won’t budge or acknowledge me. Justin nudged him a little and pushed him to tell us what’s wrong. He didn’t want to. What did I do…
A loud music started ringing through the air. My alarm…




Like the soft petals of the beautiful and symbolic Rose, we are but fragile beings. Masked by the image of poise as thorns grew increasingly menacing.

In the symbolisation of love, one does not simply set out to believe its existence. It has to be taught, experienced. The mindset to believe is a tricky path, for a wrong turn can send you tumbling through acres and acres of the hidden jungle. Where you may seek solace and peace or drown in the fear of the unknown.

Some are lucky to be cradled in love from the beginning of life. Some are not. Some learnt it the hard way, some threw themselves over love repeatedly without understanding its beauty. She, for one of the many million, walked through a journey of self doubt. Brought down by her capabilities to emote, she questions if it ever did exist. The influence of scientific nature taught us to analyse facts and data. Emotions have no data, no trend, no conclusions.

As the dilemma unfolds, a story begun.

She was all but a tiny Rose bud, refusing the immense love showered above her. For the thought of it relishing its powers over her was too much to process. Instead, shunned away, she seek comfort in solitude. Until one day, she woke to a unfamiliar warmth and comforting light that almost carried her up. A peculiar feeling, unknown to the world. Caught in the trance of pure love, the tiny Rose bud grew. Ever so beautiful in a place she never felt she belonged. The sun never stopped smiling. The curse was lifted.

In this winding journey of uncertainty, the curse creeps back through the roots unknowingly. Thorns grew sharper, words grew harsher. The sun does not understand the curse, for he cannot see. What you see, you do not understand. What you observe, you appreciate. The symbiotic relationship in all aspects of nature involves appreciation and tolerance. The strongest wins the war.

When thrown in the pit of unfamiliarity, the answer lies within. Jump one stone at a time, for the path has been set. The key is simply to observe and have faith. Once the Sun and the Rose appreciates the nature of their existence and the importance of love, they can then grow as one. Stronger than ever before.